He told me he would look after me, and I believed him.
He told me he missed me, and I believed him.
He told me I was his, and I believed him.
And the worst part of it all is, he was telling the truth. He meant it when he said it.
But now we are both pretending that neither of us ever said anything.
And now I can’t believe anything he says.
And there is nowhere safe to explain everything that happened between us.
And there is no one I can tell about what happened between us.
I can’t even write it out here fully, because it would be so obvious to anyone who knows us who I am.
So every time he or she or he ask me how I am, I smile and tell them I am OK.
And I wonder why, when he saw me so completely, he can’t see just how far away OK is.
And I realise that I am so used to having my heart shattered, that I am so good at holding it together, that no one can tell anymore.
I put everyone else before me.
And I am so very lonely.